Dreams

Sometimes I have these horribly vivid dreams. While my other dreams are pretty standard as far as dreams go, these few are like HD quality. What these high quality dreams have in common, is that in them, I break down in tears, sobbing. When I wake up, I find myself surprised that I am not actually crying. It takes a while to adjust to the fact that no information from the dream is real.

This dream was particularly gruesome. I dreamt that my cousin and her baby were murdered. Where this come from, I really don't know, but it was horrifying, as can be imagined. I don't remember much else, what I really remember, is how I was confused and broke down as I, for some reason, tried to find out who the killer was. The killer ended up being a stalker ex-boyfriend or something of the sort. Very typical crime plot. There were many inaccuracies in the dream, but of course, I noticed nothing of that while dreaming.

I actually find it quite embarrassing. I can't say exactly why I do, but I just feel silly dreaming something so unnecessary. I love these people, why do I torture myself like that? That is why I decided not to tell anyone. That is, after I told my mom, who is not the best person to tell these things. Bad decision.

But what does this mean? Besides the fact that I read and watch too much crime. How would I interpret these dreams? According to what I have read(with a simple google search) about dream interpretation, death symbolizes change. But there seems to be disagreements about whether that change can be good or bad. Maybe the fact that I only remember nightmares is also something that needs interpreting. Everyone else seems to have nice dreams where magical things happen, and they wake up happy. Mine are only nasty surprises and a general feeling of horror. It just seems unfair.